Saturday, October 21, 2006

invisible inkblot tips for listening to your iPod...


You should always remove at least one earphone to fart.
Whilst you may not hear the outcome, other passengers will. Keeping tabs on your noise pollution is polite. There's nothing you can do about the nose pollution, but if you control it properly, others will think it was the old bloke sitting next to you.

Resist the urge to air guitar down the aisle of the train.
During morning peak hour, when everyone is silent and contemplating doing their bit to pay the tax man, I frequently feel the need to dance up and doon the aisle singing "do iiiiiit.....take your mama out all night" in a high pitched voice. One day I just might.

Don't download "learn to speak French in your car" and actually think you're gonna listen to it on the journey to and from work. Don't kid yourself. Why listen to educational stuff when you can listen to the post-millennium disco resurrgence. Est-ce que mon dieu, pourquoi je n'ai pas étudié le français à l'école?
Don't break your iPod They're really quite expensive
Be prepared incase a mugger spots your white earphones. Keep an old walkman in your pocket with a Culture Club tape in it and hand it over if ever the need arises.

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